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May 11, 2005

Parental rights not important, my ass.

Okay, so Chris Muir - he of the "how many times can I get a brainstem reaction outta Spats with a picture of Sam" persuasion - did a Day By Day  strip this morning that pointed to a blogger named Cathy Seipp.  As is my wont as a King & Tyrant™, I promptly went over to check out Cathy's fine work.

And very nearly had an RCOB moment at something of hers I read about fathers' rights.

"You're taking one person's life and ruining it to make another person's better," says movement leader Michael Newdow, who also laments the fact that "women can choose to end a pregnancy but men can't."

As much as I detest Mad Mikey Newdow's ugly face, I have to admit he has a point here.  Not that I wanna see any  abortions take place, but why can't the father have any say in it?  It is  his DNA too, after all.

Personally, I don't think Newdow should have any custody or visitation rights regarding his daughter, since he never married her mother (nor should he be therefore required to pay child support)

Precisely.  Here in Texas, the courts say you can't tie the two together.

Why not?  If the Doublewide Bitch isn't making the Crown Prince™ available for me as part of the AGREED-UPON VISITATION SCHEDULE - RIGHT, YOU FAT-ASSED TROLLOP...?!?!?!?!

...*?

Oh, sorry.  Lost it for a sec.  I'm back now.

...then why should I be compelled to pay child support?  The two should  be linked, for that very reason alone.  Anyway, continuing...

but he's angry that he couldn't (for instance) take the daughter out hunting for frogs late one night because her mother said no: "It's as bad as slavery."

I'd keep the daughter away from that douchebag anyway, but that's another subject for another post.

The solution, according to Newdow and his allies, is for each parent to make all decisions for the children during their own custodial time -- which might sound reasonable for a few seconds

Sorry, Cathy - it sounds reasonable for a helluva lot longer than that.  I gotta credit Newdow here - but even a blind pig finds a truffle now & again...

until you consider the real-life applications: Mom RSVPs for a birthday party or class outing but the event is scheduled for dad's time; Dad says that's his time and he doesn't feel like chauffering the kid to the activity.

Neither would I, in that hypothetical dad's shoes.  Mom needs to either clear that with the dad, or arrange a time trade-off.  That's not as hard to accomplish as you might think  it is, Cathy.

Children are reduced to pieces of property -- which is indeed how they were historically regarded (property of their fathers, that is) until the mid-19th Century.

Oh, that is such  bullshit, Cathy.  It's a matter of holding to an agreed-upon schedule of visitation, not a matter of "property".  Time spent by a divorced parent with his/her child is valuable, hence the concept of an agreed-upon schedule.  Unlike my  particular situation, most  women don't enter into a marriage for the sole purpose of having the man give her a child, whom she then takes away from him, having never had any interest in the marriage in the first  place. (But, that's yet another topic for another post.)

I suggest that any parent who thinks "parental rights" are more important than a child's best interest should be automatically disqualified from being the custodial parent.

And here is where I think you have your head planted firmly up your ass, Cathy.  I do  happen to think parental rights - especially mine  - are, at the very least,  every bit as important - but that's because I ALREADY HAVE MY SON'S BEST INTEREST AT HEART, FOR GAWD'S SAKE!!!!!   Just like his mother  - as much as I despise her - has his best interest at heart already.

And that this has to be spelled out to you is absurd and ridiculous to the absolute extreme.

Parental rights are an absurd notion in relation to children anyway.

Yeah?  Well, have your  kids illegally taken away from you by a fuckhead and have said fuckhead's illegal actions in so doing fail to get prosecuted in the "good ol' boy" court system in said fuckhead's hometown and then  try to claim that "parental rights are an absurd notion in relation to children anyway".

So help me Cthulu, you'd get your ass laughed right out of the Blogosphere - and I'd be leading the charge.

It's certainly a basic human right not be awakened several times a night by someone screaming at you -- any guard who made the same demands on prisoners that all infants make on their parents would violate the Geneva Convention several times over

No, it's not.  Not if you have responsibility for said child, it isn't.  If your child needs you, you'd damned well better  be there for that child, if you know what's good for you.

but if that "right" took precedence over the child's right to be cared for, humanity would have died out long ago.

We certainly wish that the fools who think like this  had led the way.

Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant at May 11, 2005 05:27 PM

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Comments

Here's another little tidbit to add to Newdow's comment... a married man cannot get... umm... snipped without his wife's permission (at least in TX), but she can get a script for The Pill without his permission (I don't know about a woman getting her tubes tied, though).

As for parental rights... it'd be nice if the parents could just get along. Then again, they'd probably still be married, if that was the case. But, yeah, whoever has custody of the child at the moment makes the decisions (although, I would hope that in the case of Big Stuff- medical stuff, schooling, etc- they'd declare a truce long enough to decide together). And, yeah... it's just rude to make plans during the other parent's time.

Posted by: Beth at May 11, 2005 07:17 PM

I am the sole offspring of Cathy. I love my father very much, and I am a legitimate child. (Well I'm sixteen). When the child reaches 12 or so, the child should make the decision, not either parent. I decide when I wish to see my father, but my circumstances are quite unusual as my father can have anxiety attacks...which complicates the entire situation.
If the pregnant woman is a minor, she should not be forced by the unattached male or father of the child to keep the child. It is ultimately up to the woman to decide what to do with the child...unless she is married...then she only has fifty percent of the decision making. Once a woman is married, and impregnated, her husband should have more control as their union is eternally binding. G-D brought us into the world to procreate...but in marital situations. Thank the Lord I am legitimate...otherwise I may have been aborted.
But as the daughter of divorced parents...it is especially hard on the child to be shuffled between the two. I've seen it firsthand, and secondhand as my half-brother is also a product of another marital union, that sadly ended in the ugly d word.

Posted by: Cecile at May 11, 2005 07:31 PM

Steve,

I, like far too many Americans, have been down the divorce road. One of the differences between you and me is that I got custody of my girls. In my experiance, visitation can easily become the one of the most contentious parts of a divorce. I was ulitmately able to solve the problem by getting an assignment to Germany, and by the time the letter from my Ex's attourney caught up with me, I was already in Germany. This made any further leagal action a moot point. Having said all this, I fully agree that support and visitation should be linked, but this link should work both ways. If the custodial parent will not comply with the visitation agreement, then that parent forfeits child support. By the same token, if the non- custodial parent does not pay child support, then that parent forfeits visitation rights.

Posted by: David Hartung at May 11, 2005 10:21 PM

I am the sole offspring of Cathy.

Welcome, Cecile.  Pleased to have you here.

I love my father very much, and I am a legitimate child. (Well I'm sixteen).

That's good to hear.  But I daresay your life has value, regardless of any "legitimacy" you may or may not have.

When the child reaches 12 or so, the child should make the decision, not either parent. I decide when I wish to see my father, but my circumstances are quite unusual as my father can have anxiety attacks...which complicates the entire situation.

As it happens, Cecile, that's the law here in Texas; a child can decide at age 12 the parent with whom (s)he chooses to stay.

If the pregnant woman is a minor, she should not be forced by the unattached male or father of the child to keep the child. It is ultimately up to the woman to decide what to do with the child...

Uh, not if the child is a minor, Cecile.  We have laws in this country about how to handle a minor's pregnancy.  The courts keep sticking their arrogant, elitist noses into such matters, but that's another topic for another post.

unless she is married...then she only has fifty percent of the decision making. Once a woman is married, and impregnated, her husband should have more control as their union is eternally binding.

Welcome to Family Law 101.  According to the courts, in such a situation the father still  doesn't have much of a say in the matter.

Understand, Cecile - my rant against your mom's position isn't personal.  I'm simply sick and tired of fathers receiving short shrift when it comes to custody issues in the courts.  That needs to change, and soonest, IYAM.

Posted by: Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant at May 11, 2005 10:35 PM