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September 15, 2005
PFW: Put a skirt on Donna McNabb
Cowboys quarterback Drew Bledsoe was named the NFC Offensive Player of the week yesterday for his performance against the Chargers. He's the first Cowboy quarterback to win the award since Quincy Carter a couple years ago.
Let's hope Bledsoe hangs around a bit longer than did Q-Car. (snicker)
Further demonstrating my point that I'm right in referring to The World's Greatest Quarterback Ever In The History Of Ever, Ever™ as "Donna", the National Football League fined Atlanta Falcons defensive tackle Chad Lavalais $7,500 for applying a helmet to the chest area of McJerkface.
Po' widdle baby Donna. Memo to the NFL: Football is a contact sport. Put a dress on Donna if you don't want defenders to breathe on him.
On to this week's PFW. My Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets have their first "home" game (if you can call it that) tonight at 7:00 vs. the Saginaw (TX) Boswell Pioneers. Hard to handicap this game - Boswell handled Heights last year, 7-20, but the Jackets mauled the Pioneers the year before, 29-7, so I dunno. Could be a home-field advantage type thing, which would seem to favor the good guys this year. We'll see.
Also tonight the Utah Utes come to Fort Worth to hand the TCU Horned Frogs and their in-over-his-head coach, Gary Patterson, their collective asses on a platter.
I'm calling for Utah in a squash. Please. The sooner we get Patterson out of here, the better for the program.
Oklahoma University finally gets an idea of what kind of season it's gonna be Saturday, when it travels to Californication to take on the Bruins of UCLA.
Given what's happened the last two weeks, I fear the worst.
LSU is off this week.
Monday night, the Dallas Cowboys take on the Washington Redskins in the home opener at Texas Stadium. Dallas has won 13 of the last 14 against the 'Skins, so you'd think that Washington is due.
Not this week, though. You'd expect a TCU-type letdown after such a big win last week - but Bill Parcells is not Gary Patterson. Plus, the 'Boys are at home against a team that struggled to put up nine points against (snicker) Chicago. Look for Dallas to win comfortably.
And we have a bonus game on which your humble reporter will keep tabs. The World's Greatest College Football Team Ever In The History Of Ever, Ever™ (at least, if you ask them), SMUT, will travel to College Station this week to take on Dennis "The Mercenary" Franchione and the Texas A&M Aggies.
Normally, this is a game where I wouldn't care who won, so long as both teams kicked the shit out of each other.
But I'm in the unusual position of having to pull for a team I hate with a passion - that is to say, any team that Franchione coaches. I want A&M to kick SMU's ass up the field and right back down, just to prove to them that they're not all that and a bag of chips. And I think I've got a good shot at seeing that happen Saturday.
As usual, feel free to talk about your teams. (Except for you, "Dr Pepper" or whatever your name is, wanker. You're gonna continue to be my bitch. (chortle))
Back for the recap Tuesday.
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant at September 15, 2005 04:15 PM
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Comments
I simply stink. I haven't bathed in a loooooong time
Good choice to keep me as your bitch, still. Albeit the cowardly choice of someone like my butt-buddy Mykki who is obviously pissing his pants at the prospect of actually facing up to his talk and going down like a real man, but probably the right choice for wussies like me and him.
Ill go back to my gramma's basement and continue to play with myself and my pictures of Pee Wee Herman. Keep fighting pussy Liberals like me who hide behind their keyboards. If we change our minds and decide to act like something more than the sheep-buggerers we are, you'll get your chance to knock the shit out of us. But I wouldn't hold my breath if I were you. We are cowards, after all.
Posted by: Dr Pepper at September 15, 2005 04:47 PM
Mykki's still too much of a coward to come face you, and I'm still a little pussy that likes to hump kangaroos. Sucks to be us.
Posted by: Dr Pepper at September 15, 2005 06:21 PM
Wow.
Talk about slow learners.
Anyhoo, my Beloved Badgers get to find how they rate against REAL college football teams this week, when they fly to North Carolina to play the Tarheels. I know, UNC is barely a real football team, but, they are better than Bucky's last two sacrificial lambs, Temple and Bowling Green. I guess the bright spot for me, this year, is that Bucky has managed to beat, and beat convincingly, two teams that they really should beat. That's a step up from the past couple of years, when Bucky honestly struggled against 1-AA teams. So, on Sunday, I will have a good idea of what my Beloved Badgers will be doing this year.
The Packers, on the other hand... I don't even know who they are playing this week. And I don't care. They play the Brownies of Cleve-land this week, at home, and I expect the Packers will find a way to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory somehow.
It's a good thing I'm also a Falcons fan, as well, because the Dirty Birds have most of the makings of a Super Bowl bound team this year. So, after they whoop up on the Seaturkeys this weekend, people may sit up and take notice of Atlanta, and stop paying quite so much attention to the running back they have playing quarterback. He's fun to watch, and an outstanding athlete, but, he's not the sole reason they win. He's just a big chunk of it. The defense has done its share, as well.
Posted by: the Humble Devildog at September 15, 2005 06:37 PM
Go Redskins!
(come on....You knew I would chime in on this one......)
Mommas don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys....
Posted by: LC John Wardle at September 16, 2005 11:21 AM
Oh, by all means, John.
But if the 'Skins win...yer banned. (j/k :-) )
Posted by: Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant at September 16, 2005 01:42 PM
I see the British panty shield, Dr Peckers, is back.
Posted by: Lady Heather at September 17, 2005 02:04 PM