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September 30, 2006
No way, uh-uh, fuhgeddaboutit
So I'm skimming Yahoo! late Saturday night, and I come across this blurb where Esquire magazine named Scarlett Johansson the "Sexiest Woman Alive".
And I'm, like, "you can't fucking be serious".
Listen up, Esquire. Scarlett's pretty, no doubt - and make no mistake, I certainly wouldn't throw her out of bed.
But for my money, the absolute sexiest woman alive, bar nobody, is a woman named Lyzette Bianco. Beautiful Latina, everything in just the right places, in just the right proportion (well, she might could stand a skosh more up top, but she's still devastating). In short, the absolute most beautiful woman I've ever seen, period.
And you can quote me. 
Posted by sgc284 at 11:47 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
Ageless sayings
Been a little bit busy the last couple of days, Denizens, and will be again today, so here's something from the Grab-Bag™: Ageless sayings that are meaningless.
Enjoy. 
The closest I ever got to a 4.0 in college was my blood alcohol content.
I live in my own little world. But it's OK... they know me here.
I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with "GUESS" on it. I said, "Implants?"
I don't do drugs any more 'cause I find I get the same effect just standing up really fast.
Sign in Chinese pet store: "Buy one dog, get one flea."
Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
I don't approve of political jokes...I've seen too many of them get elected. (Appropos, considering that the GOP may lose Congress this year. -S.)
The most precious thing we have is life, yet it has absolutely no trade-in value.
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Shopping tip: You can get shoes for 85 cents at the bowling alley.
I am a nobody, and nobody is perfect; therefore I am perfect.
I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's been giving me lately!
Everyday I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I've stayed alive.
Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was a salted.
If carrots are so good for the eyes, how come I see so many dead rabbits on the highway?
How come we choose from just two people to run for President and 50 for Miss America?
Marriage changes passion... suddenly you're in bed with a relative.
Why is it that most nudists are people you don't want to see naked?
The next time you feel like complaining, remember: Your garbage disposal probably eats better than thirty percent of the people in this world.
Snowmen fall from Heaven unassembled.
Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words: "Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been!"
Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave a footprint on your heart.
Then there's the woman that steps too hard and squishes it...but let's not go there, shall we?
Posted by sgc284 at 12:02 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 27, 2006
PFW: Did he or didn't he...?
It just gets curiouser & curiouser at Valley Ranch.
Last night, 911 Services received a call from Widdle Terri Owens' publicist, stating that Bambi was "not in his normal responsive state". This morning, WFAA/Channel 8, KTCK 1310AM and the Dullest Moaning Snooze all reported that the Cowboys' resident prick had tried to off himself - a story which would seem to have been borne out by this police report (note: you'll need Adobe reader to see it).
Today, Bambi denied the whole thing.
"There was no suicide attempt," Owens said during a packed news conference at the Cowboys’ Valley Ranch headquarters.Asked why he told Dallas police that he had tried to harm himself, Owens said, "At this point, I really wasn’t as coherent as they probably thought I was. There was a number of people asking me a lot of questions."
What. The. Fuck. Ever. 
On to the PFW. Thursday night, the 17th-ranked TCU Horned Frogs are at home to play the Brigham Young Cougars. Gotta tell you, this game scares me. Give me the Frogs and seven wives...uh, points.
Also tomorrow night, my Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets are "home", so to speak, against Kennedale. Kennedale's 2-3, but they beat Azle, so...
It'll depend (as it likely will the rest of this season) on how Donnell Dickerson plays. As he goes, so go the Jackets, apparently.
Saturday afternoon, Sylvester Croom and his Mississipi State Bulldogs visit Baton Rouge for their annual whipping at the hands of the ninth-ranked LSU Tigers. MSU ain't Tulane, but they ain't Auburn, either. Vegas has 'em at +33, but I'll be charitable and give you 38. (grin)
Sunday afternoon, the Dallas Cow-Interventionists (???) travel to Tennessee to take on the Titans. This should be a Cowboys win, even if Jeff Fisher caves in and plays Vinnie Young - and even if Parcells doesn't and leaves Widdle Terri at home with his shrink.
Which would suit me just fine - I'd love to see the Cowboys give Vinnie his "Welcome to the NFL, rookie" initiation. 
OU and Turner Gill's UBuffalo Bulls are off this week. Probably couldn't come soon enough for Mr. Gill, given that Bataan Death March schedule he's been forced to go through to this point.
We're back Monday or so with the recap. In the meantime, let the trash-talking commence. (LC John Wardle, how's it feel for the 'Skins finally being able to beat a Texas any team? 
)
Posted by sgc284 at 03:42 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack
September 26, 2006
Reading assignment
Your assignment for today, Denizens, is to go read this gem from the SpatulaGoddess.
Go. Shoo.
Thatisall™.
Posted by sgc284 at 05:28 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
September 25, 2006
PFW: Revenge is a dish best served cold
First things first: The Realm™ wishes Tampa Bay Buccaneers' quarterback Phil Simms a most speedy recovery after suffering a ruptured spleen during the Bucs' game against the Carolina Panthers.
Now. Half a loaf is better than none, or so the saying goes.
at #16 Oklahoma 59, Middle Tennessee State 0
at #9 LSU 49, Tulane 7
UBuffalo 7, at #2 Auburn 38
Auburn used backups most of the game, and still cruised easily (they're calling it a late surge to win the game, but really, now), having basically won the game in the first half. But Turner Gill's team covered the spread (Vegas.com had it at 42), so it counts as a W.
...
Turner's just lucky he didn't have to play LSU this week. As Tigers coach Les Miles said, "It was the wrong week to play us".
No kidding.
JaMarcus Russell was 17 of 23 for 198, and wideout Early Doucet had 4 grabs for 36 yards and 2 touchdowns in the rout. Tailback Charles Scott also had 2 touchdowns to go with 101 yards rushing.
...
No video replay necessary this time. OU made damn sure of that.
MTS basically beat itself with four first-half turnovers, leading to three Sooner touchdowns. Peterson had 128 yards and three TDs on 27 carries, and Paul Thompson was 13 of 18 for 257 yards and three touchdowns himself.
This week: 3-0. Overall: 15-5
The PFW returns Wednesday night. TCU plays an Afternoon Rush Hour Crunch Time special Thursday, and it's anyone's guess whether I'm there in time to see the kickoff.
Posted by sgc284 at 08:40 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 24, 2006
Clinton: Pants on fire yet again
The Department of Methinks He Doth Protesteth Too Much hands us this wire from the Republic of Bullshitville, which you can find on the map as anywhere Kaiser Wilhelm von Slickmeister happens to be at the moment.
Former President Bill Clinton, angrily defending his efforts to capture Osama bin Laden, accused the Bush administration of doing far less to stop the al-Qaida leader before the September 11 attacks.In a heated interview to be aired on Sunday on "Fox News Sunday," the former Democratic president defended the steps he took after al-Qaida's attack on the USS Cole in 2000 and faulted "right-wingers" for their criticism of his efforts to capture Osama bin Laden.
Guilty as charged. You're damned right I'm gonna criticize your pathetic, half-assed, frat-boy excuse-for-a-Presidency, Slick-boy. And what the fuck do you think you're gonna do about it, asswipe?
I mean, to quote that bitch of a wife of yours,
and we have a right to debate and disagree with any administration
So sit on it and rotate, Captain El-Camino-Astroturf-Man.
"But at least I tried. That's the difference in me and some, including all of the right-wingers who are attacking me now," Clinton said when asked whether he had failed to fully anticipate bin Laden's danger. "They had eight months to try, they did not try. I tried. So I tried and failed."
This after you had seven or eight fucking years to get him, Der Kaiser. So who was it that had more opportunity again?
(crickets)
Mm-hm. Thought so...
"I authorized the CIA to get groups together to try to kill him," Clinton said. He added he had drawn up plans to go into Afghanistan to overthrow the Taliban and launch an attack against bin Laden after the attack on the Cole in the Yemeni port of Aden."Now if you want to criticize me for one thing, you can criticize me for this: after the Cole, I had battle plans drawn to go into Afghanistan, overthrow the Taliban and launch a full-scale attack search for bin Laden. But we needed basing rights in Uzbekistan - which we got after 9/11," Clinton said.
Sure you did, Ol' Slickster. Betcha they were buried under them there see-gars, weren't they?
You know - the ones you used to not have sex with that woman? Ms. Lewinski?
The former president complained at the time the CIA and FBI refused to certify bin Laden was responsible for the USS Cole attack.
Uh huh. Got proof to back that up, assclown? The value of your word seems to have gone down in recent years, y'see...
Besides, to paraphrase Misha (see below), since when did you, as Commander-in-Briefs, ever need CIA or FBI permission to go off a known terrorist raghead? That's not terribly unlike John-boy F'n Qetchup-ass' half-baked notion that we need the Useless Nitwits' permission to defend ourselves.
And you wonder why the right-thinkers of this country (i.e, the United States minus the 1000 or so asshelmets on the coasts that CNN/AP-Ipsos/Gallup/et. al. manage to scrounge up every week) don't trust the Demoscum with our national security.
"While I was there, they refused to certify. So that meant I would have had to send a few hundred special forces in helicopters, refuel at night," he said.
And of course, we all know how difficult it is for Demoscummic commanders-in-chief to conduct desert operations at night.
Isn't that right, President Peanutass?
Earlier this month, Clinton dismissed as "indisputably wrong" a U.S. television show that suggested her was too distracted by the Monica Lewinsky scandal to confront the Islamic militant threat that culminated in the September 11 attacks.
Which means that it was nail-on-the-head, 100% accurate. I mean, we all remember how we can tell that Der Kaiser is lying, right?
His lips are moving.
F.E.J.F.E 
UPDATE: And make damned sure you read Misha's take thereupon. This is why he's the Emperor and I am but a lowly King & Tyrant.
Posted by sgc284 at 11:43 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
September 22, 2006
PFW: Of instant replays & sacrificial lambs...
Sorry, guys. Been a little busy the last couple of days.
Wish I could have a weekend like three of my Perfect Football Weekend™ teams. All my local boys - Arlington Heights, TCU and the Cowboys - have somehow conspired to deny me half a PFW. (grumble grumble grouse)
The three that remain are gimmes - two for me, one heavily against me.
Saturday, the Oklahoma Sooners take out their Oregon frustrations on Middle Tennessee State at Memorial Stadium. MTS will be without standout defensive lineman Ed "Too Tall" Jones - that's a joke, for those of you younger than 30 - so I'll take OU and you can have 30.
Also Saturday, LSU takes out its own frustrations with Auburn out on Tulane at the swamp. Vegas has Tulane plus 36; I'm gonna be charitable and give you 45.
And those point spreads don't really come close to the third game in the PFW this weekend.
For, y'see, Turner Gill's UBuffalo Bulls have drawn the unenviable assignment of going down to Alabama and being the sacrificial lamb to the second-ranked Auburn Tigers.
Turner used to be on the distributing end of these beatdowns when he quarterbacked the Nebraska Cornhuskers against the likes of Troy State or Louisiana Tech. Unfortunately, he's about to be painfully reminded of his days as a basketball player for the Arlington Heights varsity when we were just that pitiful.
Chin up, my old friend. You'll get to distribute a few of these beatdowns yourself someday.
We're back Sunday for the recap. In the meantime, I'll be in East Texas this weekend - no, Your Doublewideness, I'm not coming for your skanky ass - and may be a bit incommunicado. I'll let you know.
I will now entertain suggestions from the Peanut Gallery™ as to what the Hell™ Brett Favre was thinking when he came back this year (that's your cue, Humble DevilDog)...
Posted by sgc284 at 05:08 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
September 19, 2006
PFW: Hmmm, maybe he's not in over his head...
Memo to Gary Patterson: All is forgiven.
at Arlington Heights 57, Paschal 7
UBuffalo 13, at Northern Illinois 31
LSU 3, at Auburn 7
Oklahoma 33, at Oregon 34
at TCU 12, Texas Tech 3
at Dallas 27, Washington 10
Can't tell you anything about the UBuffalo game except the final score. Which was a loss for Turner Gill's team, as I expected. They covered the spread, though, so we'll consider it a victory of sorts.
...
For the first five minutes of the game, Paschal gave Arlington Heights all it could handle, and then some. From the opening kickoff until 7:00 remained in the first period when the Panthers scored, Heights could do nothing right, and Paschal could do nothing wrong. Even when Paschal tried to fumble away the opportunity, Heights was right there with a personal foul or some other penalty to give the momentum right back. After the Panther touchdown, things weren't looking all that good. Paschal was flat-out kicking Heights' ass.
Then Paschal had to kick off.
Probably the turning point in the game.
Remember this name: Donnell Dickerson.
If this young man is wowing college football crowds a few years from now, you heard it here first: The kid is a stud.
Granted, it was Paschal. Granted, Paschal isn't very good - there are probably a couple of middle schools that would give 'em a helluva fight.
But anytime you average 30 yards a carry, I figure you're doing something right.
Dickerson's final line: 11 carries, 333 yards. Two of his carries - a 92-yarder and a 57-yarder the very next time he touched the ball - were the exact same play: a run through a huge hole off right tackle, and then just outrun all the coverage on the way to the end zone.
In the second half, after the game had already been decided, Coach Duke Christian let Dickerson play quarterback for a couple of series. Whereupon Dickerson showed off a frickin' howitzer of an arm.
You read it here first, PFWers: This kid could be the poor man's Vinnie Young.
...
The good news is that Bo Pelini's defense only allowed Auburn 7 points.
The bad news is that Les Miles' offense only scored 3.
LSU had a chance to win on the final play of the game, but JaMarcus Russell's pass to Early Doucet at the 10 was followed with a vicious hit by Auburn defensive back Eric Brock at the 4, ending the game.
Now, having said all that, I am going to sound a familiar theme: Eleven-on-eighteen still isn't fair.
LSU had a critical pass-interference penalty, as well as the drive it would have continued, overruled by a review zebra's determination that the ball was tipped, thus negating the PI penalty. Never mind that the PI came before the ball was tipped, which would've given LSU the ball with first-and-goal. Did anyone check the replay zebra for mint julep breath?
...
And if LSU thought it got shafted, Oklahoma got it three times as bad.
Scene: Oregon has just scored, but OU still leads, 33-27, with 1:09 to play. Oregon attempts the obligatory onside kick.
First blunder by the Pac-10 (read: homer) zebras working the game: An Oregon player (Brian Paysinger) touches the ball before it's traveled the requisite 10 yards. Illegal procedure, OU should have the ball at that spot, or at the very least have Oregon re-kick from five yards back.
Nothing gets called.
Second blunder: Allen Patrick of OU recovers the onside kick. And the ball gets awarded to Oregon.
And the third fuck-up in a row by the homer zebras occurs on the next play: A pass-interference call on Darien Williams gave the ball to Oregon on OU's 23. Oregon scored the winning touchdown on the next play.
Just one small, almost trivial, thing: The pass was tipped before any contact took place, and replays showed it.
Now, it's customary for the visiting team to supply officials from its conference for the game. The Pac-10, apparently, never got that memo.
Makes one almost wonder if this is the Pac-10's way of sticking it back to the Big XII for USC giving last year's national championship to TU.
...
Dallas' win over the Deadskins was hardly inspirational. The defense did what it had to do - shut down a team in its second game under a new offense - and Bledsoe, while adequate, wasn't spectacular, save for one 40-yard touchdown pass to Terry Glenn.
And a special-teams breakdown cost the Cowboys a 100-yard kickoff return by "Rock" Cartwright, which gave Parcells a pretty severe case of indigestion the rest of the night.
Moreover, Widdle Terri Owens broke his ring finger, and expects to miss 2-4 weeks. (At least, that's what they're saying - but don't let that fool you. You & I both know he's gonna play against the Beagles. Bank on that.)
...
One play epitomized TCU's effort against Texas Tech.
Late in the fourth quarter, Tech driving. Graham Harrell launches a pass down the right sideline for receiver Robert Johnson.
Enter TCU safety Marvin White.
Ball & Johnson get there simultaneously. White gets there a fraction of a nanosecond later.
BOOM!!!
Marvin White separated Robert Johnson's helmet from his body. Damned near with Johnson's head still inside.
Jeff Ballard wasn't all that great - he kept overthrowing his receivers pretty much all evening - but he was able to move the ball just enough to allow Chris Manfredini to kick four medium-range field goals to account for TCU's points, and the TCU defense made it stand up.
Tech fans (the stadium was about half-full with 'em) were all with their little "guns up" sign before and during the game. I'd say that RightAboutNow™, at least one of those guns are stuck tight to the forehead. In the shape of an L, if you know what I mean. 
Gary Patterson, I have, in this space, ripped you royally for being in over your head as a Division I NCAA coach. I now officially stand corrected, and retract it all.
You're a damned good coach, sir, and I'd just as soon you stay at TCU for a spell.
This week: 4-2 (UBuffalo covered the spread). Overall: 12-5 (they covered last week, too).
The PFW will return on Friday. Maybe. At least three of my teams are down this weekend, and maybe more.
Posted by sgc284 at 11:45 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 18, 2006
Housekeeping-ery
Memo to The Six Or Seven Of You Who Still Read Me™:
The PFW recap will be delayed until tomorrow afternoon or so. The Sibling Unit™ and I are off to see some preseason hockey (the Dallas Stars host the Atlanta Thrashers this evening).
Y'all pull Pittsburgh through to a major beatdown of the Jags for me. 
Posted by sgc284 at 11:48 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack
Bimboid milestones
Lest Her Doublewideness think I'd forgotten, today is her 37th birthday - yet another to which yours truly thinks she's not entitled, given what she did and continues to do.
In other news, yet another pro-abort, pro-homosexual, anti-family, anti-life, acid-tongued Demoscum has died - and that's all I'll say about that.
Posted by sgc284 at 10:01 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack
September 17, 2006
Benedict the Spineless
You can dress it up, but it still looks and smells like a pig.
"At this time I wish also to add that I am deeply sorry for the reactions in some countries to a few passages of my address at the University of Regensburg
Bennie, ol' boy, perhaps you could tell us Great Unwashed (a little Blackie Sherrod lingo, there) just exactly why you're sorry for any aspect whatsoever of what you said? The text or the reaction?
which were considered offensive to the sensibility of Muslims," the pope said Sunday.
Well, there's an oxymoron.
Bennie, ol' chap - I think you wanted the word sensitivities.
Mooselimbs don't have sensibilities. If they did, they never would have fucked with America in the first place.
Suggest you find yourself a new wordsmith, mkay?
And don't worry about offending the ragheads' so-called "sensitivities". Hell - even the sodomite community isn't that sensitive.
Just sayin', is all.
Posted by sgc284 at 04:28 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack
September 15, 2006
PFW: Rivalry Weekend
ESPN is calling college games this weekend "Separation Saturday". As fate would have it, a lot of nationally-ranked teams are facing each other this weekend, and...well...it's "separate the men from the boys" time - hence, "Separation Saturday".
In the Realm™, it's more of a "Rivalry Saturday". Three old rivalries heat up again, and I'm gonna try and make it to two of 'em.
Tonight, my Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets take on their longtime arch-nemesis, the Paschal Panthers. Back in the day, Heights & Paschal positively hated each other. In fact, it's been nearly 30 years since the son of a former Tarrant County commissioner (and a former Paschal student) appropriated a bulldozer and blew a hole in the Heights field house. (Heights would later blow a hole through the Panther football team, which kinda made up for it.)
Anyway, if Heights is going to get a move-on, it has to start here. Paschal hasn't been good for several years; they went 2-8 last year. If Heights doesn't win this game, there's a better-than-zero chance it'll pull an 0-fer. Nevertheless, I'm taking Heights and giving you 10.
Saturday, Turner Gill's UBuffalo Bulls travel to Northern Illinois to take on the Huskies. NIU's not too long removed with a massive flirtation with the top 25, so I want the Buffs and...say...30. 
(Vegas, FWIW, has 'em at +23.)
Also Saturday, sixth-ranked LSU travels to Alabama to take on third-ranked Auburn. I hate games like this, because I like both schools - you almost wish for a tie. Auburn is a three-point favorite, which is the value of home field, so it's basically a pick 'em. Give me LSU, straight up, just because of Bo Pelini's suffocating defense.
The 15th-ranked Oklahoma Sooners travel to Eugene Saturday to take on the 18th-ranked Oregon Ducks and the World's Ugliest College Football Uniforms™. If Oregon wears those butt-ugly yellow unis, give me Oklahoma and about 50 pair of UV 5000 sun shades.
All for me. 
22nd-ranked Texas Tech comes into Fort Worth on Saturday to take on 20th-ranked TCU. The Horned Frogs are looking to avenge 35-70 from two years ago in Lubbock.
Two things work in the Tadpoles' favor: 1) Tech isn't the world's greatest road team, and 2) UTEP shredded their secondary last week.
Tech, on the other hand...well...is Tech. And Vegas has 'em at -2, so I want TCU and 28.
Sunday evening, the Dallas Cowgirls have their home opener versus the hated Washington Foreskins Redskins. The experts keep saying Dallas is going to kick ass, but they said that last year, and Washington swept 'em. I'll take Dallas and 17 if Bledsoe plays the whole game, but I'll give you all of that back, plus 14, if Romo plays.
Should be a fun weekend. We're back Monday with the recap.
Therefore, let the tailgating/smack talk begin!
Posted by sgc284 at 08:45 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack
September 14, 2006
Air Scaremerica on the edge
The next-to-last nail in Air Scaremerica's coffin is about 7/8ths in.
Financially strapped Air America Radio acknowledged Thursday, after star commentator Al Franken said publicly that his paycheck had stopped coming, that it had suffered a small number of layoffs but insisted there were no plans for the liberal talk show network to declare bankruptcy.
That is to say, if the financial cavalry comes over that hill up yonder - but there seems to be a disturbing dearth of hoofbeats on the horizon...
AAR is defiant to the end, however.
"If Air America had filed for bankruptcy every time someone rumored it to be doing so, we would have ceased to exist long ago," said network spokeswoman Jaime Horn in a statement.
Actually, Jaime honey, Air Scaremerica "ceased to exist" pretty much a long time ago. It hasn't been relavant in...in...lessee, how long's it been around? 
"It may be frustrating to some that it hasn't happened."
Frustrating? Hell, no. I'm having a blast just watching you libtards twist in the wind! Keep up the great work!!!
Posted by sgc284 at 09:58 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 13, 2006
(Old) Comments, we get (old) comments, part deux
Candidate Number two from the Better Late Than Never™ department comes from a contributor - and I'm being nice, here - to this thread.
Writes "ashlie":
did the city of orlando have a earthquake just like 2 days ago i seen it on the news and didnt belive it at first if there was a earthquake in orlando then why didnt port orange feel the shaking was it a misunderstanding was it a political disaster is the world ending now ? omg it is help!!!!!
I'll give a Spatula City BBS! t-shirt to the first one who can translate that into something resembling a cogent thought. 
Posted by sgc284 at 09:46 PM | Comments (5) | TrackBack
September 12, 2006
(Old) Comments, we get (old) comments...!
Have no idea why, but every so often I'll get a stray comment come in on a thread that's weeks old, if not months.
Invariably, it turns out to have been written by a moonbat. (The Eddie Guerrero thread was the exception thereto. I received comments for months on end about him, by fans who genuinely mourned his passing and missed him terribly.)
Two I've received recently are no exception. The first one was placed in the Rita Cosby thread, but actually referenced this post. Though the commenter will get partial credit for a little more cordiality than previous ones on the thread, she gets flagged for delay of game (with the appropriate five-yard penalty).
So let's see what she had to say, shall we?
Reference the episode of "Cheaters" involving the Fort Worth Cop
Not to beat a dead horse, but in addition to being over a year late with your comment...you're also off topic.
What are ya'all so upset about? Cheaters was hired by the husband
No, if memory serves, Cheaters was hired by the wife to spy on the husband. Please straighten up your facts a bit, mkay?
Don't you go to work when you are hired.
Yes, but my job isn't to intrude on people's privacy and harass them. Is yours?
Cheaters doesn't just bust in on people without an invite.
Sorry, but the bullshit flag gets thrown there, 15 yards, loss of down. That's the format of their entire show. Jilted lover/spouse/what have you contacts the show to spy on their significant other, Cheaters plays private dickheads, gathers evidence, presents it to the jilted, asks them if they want to go confront.
Sorry, but your dog stopped hunting a loooooong time ago.
Heres the bottom line, you got nothing to worry about if you aren't cheating. If your not happy with your significant other, Leave them.
Cheating or not - and don't for a second misunderstand; I'm not condoning the practice - if a person is not violating the law, court cases have in the past established a right to privacy based loosely on Article IV of the Bill of Rights of the United States Constitution - and those who violate that privacy do so at their own risk.
Financial...or otherwise.
That cop knew what the hell he was doing as well as she did. This sort of thing is why cops get called to domestics. Capt. Paul knew better!
Uh, no, cops get called to "domestics" because one party is either disturbing the peace or threatening/committing violence upon the other. Extramarital affairs may be a root motivation, or not - but not every one turns into a "domestic" to which a cop gets summoned.
Try again.
Whether he likes it or not, he IS in the public eye cause he put himself there with his job.
I see. So a cop on his lunch break doesn't get the luxury of conducting his personal business without some nosy-assed fucktard with a camera invading his privacy, is that what you're saying?
So don't complain.
Make me, bimboid. In case the principle hasn't been explained fully to you, this is my blog. I say what I want to say here. Got that?
It was his choice. Cops are not above the law. He may not have broken the law by being with this woman
Unless you can show me where they've put adultery back on the books, honeybunch, I'd consider replacing "may not have broken" with "didn't break", y'know?
but he DID violate Police policy the way he did it.
Prove it. Chapter, verse & paragraph, if you please.
Captain, you are supposed to lead by example. Now can you really discipline your officers with your head held high knowing, you are no better?
On one hand, I'm inclined to agree with this assessment. The captain should lead by example.
On the other hand, just what the Hell™ business of his officers - or of yours, for that matter - would the captain's personal life be? Hmmmmmmmm?
You also assisted in breaking up a family. If your going to be so thoughtless, don't bitch when you get caught.
Again, what business is that of yours? Or anyone's, for that matter? What was the point of dragging a man's private life out into the open like this?
For that matter, is your own house in order? How about you worry about keeping your nose clean before trying to wipe Captain Paul's for him, huh?
Or would that be asking too much of...
A Former Texas Dispatcher STILL DISPATCHING
Posted by sgc284 at 06:16 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 11, 2006
In Memoriam
(The following is a column which appeared on my web site, www.spatulacitybbs.com, on September 11th, 2001. It is re-posted now in remembrance of then.)
NOTE: This column contains some coarse language. Back out now if such language offends you, please.
I got four hours of sleep last night. I'm fighting the obligatory yearly case of tonsillitis. My throat hurts like Hell (tm), my body is racked with soreness, and - not to put too fine a point thereupon - I'm in need of a tube of Prep H.
You get the idea. (sigh)
So here I am on LBJ Freeway in Dallas, plodding my way through traffic, fighting hard the urge to fall asleep at the wheel, literally. I'm listening to our sports-talk/guy-talk station on AM, the Ticket (KTCK 1310), when the sports jocks there suddenly exclaim something to the effect of, "WTF...?!". Apparently, a heavy jet has veered off course and slammed into one of the World Trade Center twin towers in New York City.
"Wow," I'm thinking, "they'll likely stay with this one all day", and I immediately turn over to the news/talk station here, WBAP 820, for all the coverage. Yes, I admit it - I'm fascinated by carnage.
At that point, though, I'm thinking tragic accident. Somebody's plane lost its hydraulics and careened out of control, and the World Trade Center, unfortunately, was simply in the way.
That was 7:50. At 8:09, my worldview - and that of 280 million Americans, I would bet - changed radically.
At that point, a second jet slammed headfirst into the other tower. At that point, it's not just a major tragedy. This looks just a weeeee bit too organized to be a coincidence.
It's 8:20 when I get to the office, and I meet my buddy and old Wingtip Courier dispatcher as he's driving up. He hasn't been paying attention to anything. We get inside the office, and I bring him and our other compadre up to speed on things (he wasn't listening to the radio, either, which was surprising). I go into my office and try pulling up a video stream for any of this. It's 8:25.
Fifteen minutes later, the message is clear: America is under attack for the first time in 60 years. Yet another heavy jet has crashed - this one into the Pentagon. Reports are coming in about multiple hijackings. I've read a report about a worldwide alert issued last Friday concerning our resident international terrorist, Osama bin Laden, Two & two are quickly starting to come together.
(Side note: Don't let them tell you they had no warning. I'm not kidding about that worldwide alert concerning bin Laden. They knew. Damned right they knew.)
I can't pull up anything on the 'Net - and I have a T1 at work. The radio offers some details, but I want to know more. I run across the street to the CompUSSR to scope out the TV images.
And ohmigod - what TV images. I saw the second plane come in behind the first tower, and a plume of fire and deep black smoke explode out the other side. I saw the collapsed side of the Pentagon. I saw both WTC towers collapse - I had to ask someone if they'd collapsed all the way, so incredulous was the scene there. (A third building nearby would collapse six hours later.) I heard reports of yet another plane crash - this one near Pittsburgh. Rumor has it that the plane was headed to Camp David - we're somewhere around the anniversary of the Camp David accords, so I hear.
Returned to work around 11:00 in a state of near-shock. Twenty minutes later, I received the go-ahead to go home. After a quick stop-off at the school to check on my wife, I arrived home and turned on the TV to Fox.
The images there were even more unbelievable than before. Fox had the direct angle on the second tower hit. They also had better angles on the collapse of both towers - although by that time, there was so much smoke & dust that one could hardly make anything out.
After a quick lunch, I sit down here to gather news stories, and I find this.
That's right, sports fans. Here are a group of Palestinian squids laughing, dancing and cheering the attack on us, whom they call "the Great Satan".
Compassionate people, those Palestinians.
Okay, now that I've bored you with my day, here's my analysis: CNN early on was doing everything it could to avoid calling it a terrorist attack. But, Spatulaites & Spatulaettes, it's too coordinated, too organized to be anything but. These events had to be planned months in advance. Certain people had to be installed at just the right junctures in order to pull this off - our airport security procedures, despite the fact that they're handled by part-timers making minimum wage, are still way too strict. People who knew how to fly those planes had to arrange for passage on these planes. This would have been a major undertaking for simply one airliner - for four to have been hijacked in this manner and turned into suicide machines screams for the fact that this is more than just a Chinese fire drill.
So. Who's got the capability to pull it off? Who has the money to train these thugs, place them right where they needed to be placed, and then turned loose? And who among them hates us enough to target us? Not to mention, who's stupid-assed enough to try it?
If you haven't figured it out by now, go back to school and take a comprehensive reading course. You think about it, there's really only one man who qualifies: Osama bin Laden.
There can be no question. The mastermind behind the 1993 bombing at the aforementioned World Trade Center is so consumed with hatred for the United States that it sticks in his craw that he failed to bring us down eight years ago. So he decided to try and finish the job, gambling that we'll be too chicken-shit to do anything about it.
(Second side note: Yeah, the Palestinians and the Taliban in Afghanistan are denying responsibility. Don't believe the bastards. This is their baby.)
This is where George W. Bush needs to prove him wrong. Take this one to the bank, my friends: The Bush presidency - whether he believes it or not, whether he likes it or not - rides on how he handles this.
America is screaming for justice. More to the point, America is screaming for revenge. This is nothing short of an act of war. Yes, war. There's been a formally undeclared one on us now, by most of the non-Israeli countries of the Middle East, for several years now. The Muslims hate our guts. The Syrians, the Iraqis, the Iranians - we're their enemy. "Death To America" has been cruising at #1 on the Middle Eastern Top 40 for several years. They're getting bolder, too - because they think we're too cowardly to fight back. They think we've forgotten how to fight.
If George Bush has any balls, now's the time to prove them wrong.
This is your solution, like it or not: Any country harboring terrorists - that would include Afghanistan, Iraq, Iran, Libya, Syria, et. al. - must be wiped from the face of the earth.
Scramble 30 bombers. Five warheads each - six if the plane will hold it. Bomb the shit out of these countries - get rid of these raghead bastards.
So what if you take innocents out, too? This is war, people. They don't care about killing our innocents; why should we give a shit about theirs??
And that goes for the Palestinians, too. Let's do Israel a favor and eliminate those sons-of-bitches from the annals of history, as well. They want to laugh and make merry at our misfortune, they need to pay the ultimate price.
Show the world some balls, George W. Teach them that there's a price for fucking with America. Demonstrate to them that we have not forgotten how to fight!
Posted by sgc284 at 06:45 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack
September 10, 2006
PFW: Starring Drew Bledsoe as Vinny Testaverde
A long time ago, I made a bet with a co-worker of mine concerning a former Cowboys quarterback by the name of Danny White. (For the Uninitiated™, Danny White was the guy who succeeded Roger Staubach as quarterback after Roger retired.) I made it with my bud after the infamous (to Cowboy fans, anyway) Tom Landry "No, no, Danny, no!!!" incident.
The bet was that Danny White would never win a Super Bowl as Cowboys quarterback. And, needless to say - I won the bet.
Concerning another Cowboys #11 at quarterback, you heard it here first: The Cowboys will never go anywhere with Drew Bledsoe as the starting quarterback.
Arlington Heights 7, at Birdville 14
UBuffalo 40, at Bowling Green 48 (OT)
at LSU 45, Arizona 3
at Oklahoma 37, Washington 20
at TCU 46, UC-Davis 13
Dallas 17, at Jacksonville 24
Birdville jumped out to a quick 14-0 lead, then stopped Heights on downs in the final minute of the game. Duke Christian is now 0-2 at Heights for the first time in a while, and in any other world except high-school football, the calls for his head would already be starting. (shrug) Maybe if I adopt Prestonwood Christian Academy...
...
Turner Gill's U of Buffalo Bulls took Bowling Green to overtime before losing on a strange 4th-and-1 play.
Quarterback Drew Kelly handed off to back Steven King, whereupon King fumbled. Kelly recovered and the play was blown dead - apparently the Dave Casper rule applies in college, as well. (Sorry rule for college, if you ask me.)
...
Arizona's uniforms make them look like a high-school team. Against Bo Pelini's LSU defense, they may as well have been.
The Wildcats managed only 54 total yards through the first three quarters. The backups managed nearly twice that (102) in the fourth, once things stopped mattering.
...
Had Bob Stoops known that Paul Thompson was going to have a second game like this last year, he might not have pulled him after the TCU game.
Thompson threw two touchdown passes to receiver Malcolm Kelly, and Adrian Peterson was Adrian Peterson, running for 165 yards and two scores as the Sooners put Washington away in the second half.
...
One might look at the final score of the TCU game Saturday night, and seen an efficient, workmanlike effort against an outmanned Cal-Davis team.
Nothing could be farther from the truth.
The game was pure slop. Two missed PATs. Thirteen penalties. At least two blown coverages leading to big Aggie plays. Gary Patterson's got his work cut out for him if the Frogs are going to improve in time to handle Texas Tech next week.
And it's not as if the Frogs had the only sloppiness in the game. A play under review by the officiating took - and I'm not making this up - at least five minutes to decide. This after the NCAA instituted new clock rules in order to speed up games.
...
This is a game the Cowboys flat-out should have won. This team had no business losing that game.
The Cowboys' first play was a 12-yard slant to Widdle Terri Owens. It was the last time they threw that route to him all day long. They got a touchdown out of that drive, a field goal on the next...then 4 straight three-and-outs, then Bledsoe turned into Bledsoe and threw two interceptions which led directly to Jaguar short fields, then Jaguar touchdowns.
Owens caught a TD late, then Bledsoe threw yet another interception on the final drive to kill any Dallas hope.
The defense played well enough, but they were simply out there too long, thanks to Bledsoe's offensive ineptness. And if this is the best we can do, we're looking at another 6-10 year. Maybe.
This team has gotta see Romo if it's even gonna get a sniff of the playoffs.
This week: 3-3. Overall: 7-4 (the Cowboy-ViQueen tie last week doesn't count).
We're back Friday for another go at it.
Posted by sgc284 at 08:23 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
Memo to Widdle Mackie Brown
Not quite as easy without Vinnie Young, is it, hombre???
Posted by sgc284 at 12:36 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 08, 2006
PFW: Did Benny Hinn lay hands on that hammy...?
Well, PFWers, the games in the NFL now count - Pittsburgh intercepted Daunte Culpepper twice late to grind out a 28-17 victory in the NFL opener last night - and lo & behold, Widdle Terri Owens is heeeeeeee-ullllllllll-duh!!!!! Terri's widdle hammy was kissed by Mommy to make it better, and he'll likely start the Cowboys opener.
Raise your hand if this surprised you at all.
Anyway, we'll get to the Cowboys in a moment. This week's crack at the PFW starts with my Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets traveling to Haltom City to take on the Birdville Buffaloes. Last time Heights played Birdville, the Buffs ended their 2004 season with a playoff one-and-done, 13-21. And as I said Sunday evening, Birdville's area-ranked this year, while Heights couldn't even defeat Azle. I'll take Heights and I want 21.
Saturday, Turner Gill's UBuffalo Bulls travel to Ohio to play Bowling Green. BG's gotten pretty good since Dennis Franchione's TCU squad put the hurt to 'em a few years back, so give me the Bulls plus 17 (Vegas.com, hereinafter known as "Vegas", has 'em at +23).
Also Saturday, 15th-ranked Oklahoma will host the U. of Washington at Memorial Stadium. Washington's supposedly a 17-point underdog at Norman, but after the UAB debacle last week, I'll take OU and give you 7.
Bo Pelini and the 8th-ranked LSU Tigers host Bob Stoops brother Mike and the Arizona Wildcats at 3:30 Saturday. Vegas has LSU as a 15½-point favorite, but LSU's better than that at home. I'll take the Tigers and you can have 20.
His Rudeness will be in Fort Worth at Amon G. Carter Stadium Saturday evening to watch the 22nd-ranked TCU Horned Frogs take on the University of California at Davis. Cal-Davis is an NCAA I-AA team, and normally such games, especially at home, are breathers.
But I see this game and I think of two words - Northwestern State.
One of the last times TCU played a I-AA team, Northwestern State came into Amon Carter and almost literally handed TCU its collective head. This game will scare the Hell™ out of me right up until TCU's up by 30 with 2:00 to play.
Sunday is Opening Day for the Dallas Cowboys, as they're in Jacksonville to take on the Jaguars. Jacksonville doesn't have a great offense, but it's defense is a killer, so that'll keep 'em in the game long enough to squeak by Dallas, even with Widdle Terri's hammy now supernaturally healed - and Randy Galloway's got a great take on that.
We're back Monday or so with the recap. In the meantime, feel free to rant on about your favorite teams.
Let the tailgating...commence!
Posted by sgc284 at 09:39 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack
September 07, 2006
Free speech: Void where prohibited by Demoscummic hissy-fit
Guys, remember when Babs Streisand, the Nose that Honks™, gor a little pissy that her hubby wouldn't get to show his ass to the nation on free TV while portraying Ronaldus Magnus? Remember when she accused the Republicans of trying, and I quote, "to muscle the First Amendment"?
Wellllllllllllllll, now the shoe would seem to be on the other foot, wouldn't it?
Urging him to cancel the ["Allegedly" -LSI] grossly inaccurate upcoming miniseries "The Path to 9/11," the Senate Democratic Leadership on Thursday sent the following letter to Disney President and CEO Robert Iger. Disney’s subsidiary ABC erroneously claims the misleading miniseries is based on 9/11 Commission report and is planning to air it on Sept. 10 and 11. Shockingly, the network is also planning to use the program as a teaching tool through Scholastic, potentially misinforming thousands of children about the most important event in recent American history.
An event which can be directly tied to their honeyboy Kaiser Wilhelm von Slickmeister's utter failure - indeed, his complete unwillingness - to capture or kill Osama bin Laden when he had several chances to do so. Suppose that might be the basis for their chagrin?
Naaaaaah, couldn't be. Not the Democrats. Why, they're the staunch defenders of free speech and patriotic dissent. They couldn't possibly be advocating...(gasp!!!)...censorship - could they?
Could they?
The text of the letter, signed by Senate Democratic Leader Harry Reid, Assistant Democratic Leader Dick Durbin, and Senators Debbie Stabenow, Charles Schumer, and Byron Dorgan, is below.Dear Mr. Iger,
We write with serious concerns about the planned upcoming broadcast of The Path to 9/11 mini-series on September 10 and 11.
"We're shitting our pants because we're about to be exposed!"
Countless reports from experts on 9/11 who have viewed the program indicate numerous and serious inaccuracies that will undoubtedly serve to misinform the American people about the tragic events surrounding the terrible attacks of that day.
"Our hand-picked spinmeisters have told us that our asses are in slings, should this reach the eyes & ears of the electorate!"
Furthermore, the manner in which this program has been developed, funded, and advertised suggests a partisan bent unbecoming of a major company like Disney and a major and well respected news organization like ABC.
"We didn't get a chance to have our people 'massage' it."
We therefore urge you to cancel this broadcast to cease Disney’s plans to use it as a teaching tool in schools across America through Scholastic. Presenting such deeply flawed and factually inaccurate misinformation to the American public and to children would be a gross miscarriage of your corporate and civic responsibility to the law, to your shareholders, and to the nation.
"How dare you tell the truth about a bloated, incompetent bureaucracy and make us Democrats look bad in the process!!! You Nazi, you!!!"
The Communications Act of 1934 provides your network with a free broadcast license predicated on the fundamental understanding of your principle obligation to act as a trustee of the public airwaves in serving the public interest. Nowhere is this public interest obligation more apparent than in the duty of broadcasters to serve the civic needs of a democracy by promoting an open and accurate discussion of political ideas and events.
Translation: "Broadcast this, and if we ever get back into power, we'll ruin Mickey Mouse's ass. We have loooooooong memories, Iger, and you'll look like Michael Jackson by the time we're done with you."
Disney and ABC claim this program to be based on the 9/11 Commission Report and are using that assertion as part of the promotional campaign for it.
"You're threatening to expose us for the foreign-policy chickenshits we Democrats are!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
The 9/11 Commission is the most respected American authority on the 9/11 attacks
Okay, all together now...
and association with it carries a special responsibility.
"See this lovely little tinfoil hat?"
Indeed, the very events themselves on 9/11, so tragic as they were, demand extreme care by any who attempt to use those events as part of an entertainment or educational program.
Gee, that's not what you guys were saying 23 years ago when you were pointing to the movie "The Day After". You bloviating bastards were so damned certain that Reagan was going to lead us into a nuclear confrontation with your butt-buddies the Soviets that you were positive that "The Day After" was our immediate future.
Only it never did happen, did it? Funny how we didn't hear a peep out of you fucktards after that.
To quote Steve McPhereson, president of ABC Entertainment, "When you take on the responsibility of telling the story behind such an important event, it is absolutely critical that you get it right."Unfortunately, it appears Disney and ABC got it totally wrong.
"They made our Boy Scout Billy out to be the baddie!!!!! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!"
Despite claims by your network’s representatives that The Path to 9/11 is based on the report of the 9/11 Commission, 9/11 Commissioners themselves, as well as other experts on the issues, disagree.
Oh, this ought to be good. Pass the popcorn...
# Richard Ben-Veniste, speaking for himself and fellow 9/11 Commissioners who recently viewed the program
Would one of those commissioners be Jaime Gorelick, the bitch who constructed the wall between the FBI and CIA, thus preventing the sharing of intelligence that very likely would have prevented 9/11? That commissioner, Ben-Vagina?
said "As we were watching, we were trying to think how they could have misinterpreted the 9/11 Commission’s findings the way that they had." ["9/11 Miniseries Is Criticized as Inaccurate and Biased," New York Times, September 6, 2006]
"They didn't blame Bush enough!!!! BLASPHEMY!!!!!!!!"
# Richard Clarke, the former counter-terrorism czar, and a national security advisor to ABC has described the program as "deeply flawed" and said of the program’s depiction of a Clinton official hanging up on an intelligence agent, "It’s 180 degrees from what happened." ["9/11 Miniseries Is Criticized as Inaccurate and Biased," New York Times, September 6, 2006]
Yeah, this would be the same Richard Clarke that said...
the modest size of the terrorist leader's organization and his minimal involvement in the daily bomb attacks on coalition forces made that claim unlikely.Though [he] was a symbol of terrorism, he commanded only a few hundred people out of tens of thousands involved in the insurgency ...
The Jordanian-born terror leader was behind many high profile attacks and beheadings, Clarke said, but was not involved in most of the roadside bombings that have made Iraq so dangerous for coalition troops.
Oh, the terrorist leader about whom he was speaking? Guy by the name of Al-Zarqawi.
Yeah, that's a reeeeeeeal authority you guys have there, Demoscum.
# Reports suggest that an FBI agent who worked on 9/11 and served as a consultant to ABC on this program quit halfway through because, "he thought they were making things up." [MSNBC, September 7, 2006]
Oh, yes - quite true. They put a restraining order on him after he made a pass at Ariel the mermaid during a Disney World parade.
# Even Thomas Kean, who serves as a paid consultant to the miniseries, has admitted that scenes in the film are fictionalized. ["9/11 Miniseries Is Criticized as Inaccurate and Biased," New York Times, September 6, 2006]
Let me guess: The ones which showed yours to be brass? Where you dove into the North Tower as it was coming down to save the puppy?
That Disney would seek to broadcast an admittedly and proven false recounting of the events of 9/11 raises serious questions about the motivations of its creators and those who approved the deeply flawed program
That Disney would be sufficiently bold as to air a program that dares to paint Demoscum in an accurate light for once - well, quite frankly, it's damned refreshing. Here's hoping there's more where that came from.
Finally, that Disney plans to air commercial-free a program that reportedly cost it $40 million to produce serves to add fuel to these concerns.
Y'know, that's funny. I seem to remember that "The Day After" was run commercial-free (or at the very least with extremely limited commercial interruption), and not so much as a peep from the Demoscum.
Gee, wonder why that was?
These concerns are made all the more pressing by the political leaning of and the public statements made by the writer/producer of this miniseries, Mr. Cyrus Nowrasteh, in promoting this miniseries across conservative blogs and talk shows.
"Gasp!!!!! He's a REPUBLICAN!!!!!!!!!!!!! BLACKLIST HIM IMMEDIATELY!!!!! HE'S NEVER TO WORK IN HOLLYWOOD EVER AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!"
Frankly, that ABC and Disney would consider airing a program that could be construed as right-wing political propaganda on such a grave and important event involving the security of our nation is a discredit both to the Disney brand and to the legacy of honesty built at ABC by honorable individuals from David Brinkley to Peter Jennings. Furthermore, that Disney would seek to use Scholastic to promote this misguided programming to American children as a substitute for factual information is a disgrace.
Yeah, how dare they refuse to dance to your harps.
As 9/11 Commission member Jamie Gorelick said, "It is critically important to the safety of our nation that our citizens, and particularly our school children, understand what actually happened and why – so that we can proceed from a common understanding of what went wrong and act with unity to make our country safer."
Oh, I think they'll understand. And if they put action to their understanding, you Demoscum will be out of power for a loooooooong time to come.
Should Disney allow this programming to proceed as planned, the factual record, millions of viewers, countless schoolchildren, and the reputation of Disney as a corporation worthy of the trust of the American people and the United States Congress will be deeply damaged.
Why's that, fuckheads? Because they will have finally exposed your asses for the bunch of incompetent Bush-bashing boobs you people have been for the last five-plus years? Because they will have finally been told the truth - that Bill Clinton was more concerned with getting his dick sucked by a fat intern or playing a round of golf than ensuring the safety and the security of the people he was sworn to protect?
Truth hurts, doesn't it, guys?
We urge you, after full consideration of the facts, to uphold your responsibilities as a respected member of American society and as a beneficiary of the free use of the public airwaves to cancel this factually inaccurate and deeply misguided program.
"Or else you'd best come and do some hellacious dick-sucking the next time you want your license renewed."
We look forward to hearing back from you soon.
"Before we call our lapdogs at the ACLU and the IRS."
Sincerely,Senate Democratic Leader Harry Reid
Assistant Democratic Leader Dick Durbin
Senator Debbie Stabenow
Senator Charles Schumer
Senator Byron Dorgan
Behold the five Fifth Columnists who scream bloody murder about censorship whilst practicing it so assiduously themselves.
F.E.J.F.E
Posted by sgc284 at 09:18 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack
September 05, 2006
McFookhead escapes a missile
(Hat tip to the SpatulaGoddess.)
Somebody fired a missile at the Airborne Campaign Finance Reform Express™???
And it missed???
DA...!!! - er, um, what a relief.
(Mr. McCool, bring me Korrioth's painstick and get that pointy-eared Klingon half-breed up here on the double. That p'tahk is gonna learn to target if it kills him, fer Cthulu's sake!!!)
Posted by sgc284 at 06:49 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
September 04, 2006
Steve Irwin: 1962 - 2006
You either loved Steve Irwin, or you hated him. You were either drawn to his infectious personality, or you were pissed off at that time he put his kid in danger.
One thing about him, though - he was never boring.
Steve Irwin died today at the hands - or, rather, the barb - of a stingray. Steve Irwin was 44.
I suppose it was expected that something like this would happen someday, but I always figured it'd be a crocodile that got him.
Steve Irwin will be missed. The Realm™ extends prayers & condolences to Terri and the kids.
Posted by sgc284 at 06:02 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack
September 03, 2006
PFW: Get pushed around, win late, rinse, repeat
WACO - Denizens, I want you to go look at this PFW report. Substitute "Baylor" for "Iowa State".
You now have my report for the game.
at Arlington Heights 31, Azle 34 (OT)
at UBuffalo 9, Temple 3 (OT)
at #10 Oklahoma 24, UAB 17
at #8 LSU 45, Louisiana-Lafayette 3
#22 TCU 17, at Baylor 7
at Dallas 10, Minnesota 10 (OT)
Heights could only manage a field goal in overtime. Bad feeling about this team - if it can't beat Azle, one wonders if it'll beat anyone outside of North Side.
...
Turner Gill won his coaching debut in a snoozefest.
...
JoMarcus Russell threw 3 first-half scores en route to a massive route in their Little Sisters of the Poor game.
...
Adrian Peterson ran for 139 yards and two second-half touchdowns, including the game winner as OU squeaked by Alabama-Birmingham.
...
Tony Romo passed for a game-tying touchdown late in the fourth quarter, then Mike Vanderjagt missed two field-goal attempts in overtime in a sister-kisser. He likely cost fourth-round draft choice Skyler Green his job, as Bill Parcells kept an extra kicker (Shawn Suisham) for just-in-case. IYAM, Vander-choke is lucky to be employed RightAboutNow™.
...
On to TCU. No two ways about it - Baylor flat-out kicked the Frogs' asses. Up the field and back down. TCU was lucky to be down only 0-7 at half.
Jeff Ballard got his bell rung in the second quarter of what they were calling the "God Bowl" (there were t-shirts in the crowd asking the question "Who's the Holiest?" (grin)), and was replaced by Marcus Jackson. Jackson threw an 84-yard strike to Aaron Brown in the third quarter to put the Tadpoles up for the first time all night, then the Frog ground game managed to push down to the three in the fourth, where Jackson threw another TD pass to tight end Quinton Cunigan midway through the quarter.
TCU's defense, flung around all night like a Raggedy Andy doll, stiffened in the fourth and made the lead stand up, thus preserving the nation's second-longest winning streak at 11 games. But they'll have to be a helluva lot better if they're to be taken seriously from this point forward.
The PFW returns Friday for another shot. Probably won't get it, though - Heights takes on Birdville, and they're ranked in the area. Like I said - if Heights can't beat Azle...
Posted by sgc284 at 09:09 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
September 02, 2006
Happy blog-birthday to me...
Oh, by the way...not that you were keeping track...but the Realm™ turns three years old today.
Posted by sgc284 at 03:51 PM | Comments (9) | TrackBack
Childhood: Void where prohibited by law?
Back in the day (translation: a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away (grin)), my dad toiled as a security guard for more than a couple companies. One of his posts was this strip center in North Richland Hills - a 48,000 square-foot complex with one area about 15,000 square-foot of that.
It just happened to be down the street from a bowling center. Bowling, at the time, was one of my passions. (Still would be, if it didn't tear up my hand every time I threw a few games.)
One particular Saturday, I was with my dad while he was at work. And I knew the center was there, and I wanted to go bowling while he did his guard work. So he gave me $20, and sent me on my way.
With the keys to his car, and an admonition to stay on the side streets & parking lots.
And yes - I drove. And managed to not hit anything there, or back - as it turned out, I was pretty good at the driving thing. (Mind you, this was the early '70s, when there was far less of a paranoia about kids doing things that would put fuckhead busybodies in a tizzy today.)
Contrast that with this story, where audible gasps of indignation can be heard all across the Dallas-Fort Worth area and beyond.
A McKinney man accused of allowing his 10-year-old son to drive his car with another child in the vehicle remained in custody Friday.Jose Antonio Lugo, 29, was arrested about 11 p.m. Sunday after McKinney police received a report that the boy was driving his father and the other child around.
McKinney police Capt. Randy Roland said Friday that Mr. Lugo appeared to have been drinking.
Hmmm. That would likely have made the kid a better driver than the dad at the time. (Come to think of it, when my dad was drunk, I was a better driver than he was, too.)
A witness said she saw the boy drive the car onto U.S. Highway 380 from a Jack in the Box parking lot.She said she saw the man switch seats with the boy and drive for a bit, weaving noticeably. She said she then saw the car stop and the boy return to the driver's seat before Mr. Lugo's arrest.
Mr. Lugo's green Taurus was parked near the intersection of Highway 380 and Waddill Street when investigating officers arrived, Capt. Roland said. Mr. Lugo was seated on the passenger side.
"We arrested him for [two counts] of endangering a child," Capt. Roland said, noting that an 8-year-old girl was in the back of the car.
Looks like they were going to get this guy either way. Kid in the driver's seat, endangerment. Dad in the driver's seat, possible DWI, endangerment. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. Rock, hard place, all that silliness.
Now understand, I'm not in favor of dads driving drunk with kids in the car. Cthulu knows I had to put up with enough of that myself - remind me to tell you of the time my dad blew out both of his left-side tires one time in Fort Worth.
I just wonder why everything has to be a federal case all the time nowadays, is all.
Each charge carries a possible two-year prison term. Mr. Lugo remains at the Collin County Detention Center, sheriff's deputies said.Capt. Roland said Child Protective Services was called to take temporary custody of the children. He said the boy is Mr. Lugo's son.
Mr. Lugo's wife, Mari, said the girl is their daughter.
Mr. Lugo's bail was set at $10,000. His wife said she doesn't know how she can pay that and continue to care for her four children.
Oh, I wouldn't worry there, Señora Lugo. Child Abductive will likely relieve you of that responsibility now, if past history is any indication.
Score one for the nosy-assed pisspots. (Not that this guy Lugo didn't have it coming, okay? There's just a little too little "mind your own business" mindsets in society these days, and it bugs the shit outta me.)
I mean, think about it for a second. Subtract the alcohol. Subtract the likely DWI for Mr. Lugo. What if a father wants to teach his young'un to drive before said young'un reaches driver's ed in high school, and some busybody fuckwad sees it and reports it?
Society-at-large seems to be thinking more & more that your children are their children, and are acting accordingly. Meaning, if society-at-large doesn't like the way you're raising the rugrats...get it?
Won't surprise me if one day, one of these busybody fuckwits finds him/herself on the business end of...well...
Just sayin', is all.
Posted by sgc284 at 03:45 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
September 01, 2006
Housekeeping-ery
Once again, a reminder: If you're trying to post comments - say, about your favorite teams during a PFW thread - and they're getting thrown back in your face, and you're certain you're not on my shit list, email me.
In your email, paste your comment so I can check it against MT-Blacklist and figure out what I need to tweak.
Thatisall™.
Posted by sgc284 at 07:43 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack