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October 18, 2007
PFW: In memoriam, and other ellipsi... (UPDATED)
We start this edition of the Perfect Football Weekend™ by noting that former Cowboy running back Ron Springs is on life support and near death (in fact, earlier reports on Yahoo! News had indicated he was already brain-dead).
The PFW, and I suspect the entire Cowboy and Redskin Nation (cornerback Shawn Springs is Ron's son) mourns the impending death of this fierce NFL warrior and fine man. Ron Springs will be missed.
Next, we note with more than a little bit of anticipation that the University of Nebraska fired athetic director Steve Pedersen on Monday after the worst home loss in nearly 50 years.
Pedersen, as you'll recall, is the one who gave the Husker Nation the "greatness" (cough) of Bill Callahan - this when both Turner Gill and Bo Pelini were angling for the gig.
Now granted, Turner hasn't burned up Division 1-A with the UBuffalo program, but he is making a bit of progress - he's 3-1 in conference play, and reports indicate they're starting to play a little better.
Former Husker head coach Tom Osborne is taking over temporarily as AD - and the hope from here is that it's permanent.
Memo to Tom: Hire Bo or Turner, and all will be forgiven. Hell, I'll even make Nebraska a PFW team again.
KORRIOTH: Wow, what overwhelming, irresistible incentive.
LSIK&T: Oh, hush, Bumpy.
KORRIOTH: (chuckle)
Alright, let's get to it. We're doing this early because the Texas Christian Horned Frogs are at home tonight in Mountain West Conference play against the Utah Utes - or, as the more smart-assed among us like to call them, the Oo-taw Ootes.
Now, the Froggies are 4-3, but they're 1-2 in conference. This game will go a long way towards determining where - or if - they go to a bowl this year.
Also tomorrow night, my Arlington Heights Yellow Jackets will seek to get a measure of revenge against the O.D. Wyatt Chaparrals. Wyatt won last year's game 20-17, so I'll go out on a limb and predict a squash for Heights. Not. 
Speaking of Turner Gill's UBuffalo Bulls, Saturday they travel to Syracuse to take on The Second-Ugliest Uniforms In College Football™, aka the Orangemen. Syracuse simply does not believe in putting any white on their home unis - orange jerseys are trimmed in blue numbers. (Believe it or not, they actually looked better in Donna McNabb's day.) The line is actually Syracuse by 4 - memo to Turner: see what a couple of wins will do for a program? 
You gotta feel for Iowa State. On the heels of getting smashed by TU...here comes fifth-ranked Oklahoma. So help me Cthulu, Sam Bradford is licking his chops. The OU offense gets well this week - look for them to hang 60 on the Cyclones.
Things don't get any easier for the fourth-ranked LSU Tigers (SIDE NOTE: I am pleased that the pollsters apparently realized that the Ken-Fucky loss wasn't their fault), as they host 17th-ranked Auburn. But I absolutely, positively, no-doubt-about-it guarantee that the Tigers will win.
MERLIN: Boo.
KORRIOTH: Hiss.
OZY MCCOOL: We don't get paid enough for these puns.
KORRIOTH: For once, I'm in complete agreement with you, Ozy.
OZY MCCOOL (looking shocked - Korrioth's never called him by name before): Uh...thank you, Captain.
LSIK&T: Look, guys, is it my fault that both their mascots are Tigers?
MERLIN: No, but it's your fault that you have to be so damned corny about it.
LSIK&T: Aaaaah, go fly a kite.
MERLIN: In space?
LSIK&T: What-ever.
Anyway, LSU's favored by 11, but I don't trust that line. Especially if Doucet doesn't play.
UPDATE: According to Holly Rowe of ESPN, Doucet is healthy and will start.
Sunday, the Dallas Cowboys are at home for a return engagement against the Minnehaha Minnesota Vikings. This may be a bad time to be catching the Purple & Yellow, as former OU running back Adrian Peterson seems to have found his next gear (he put up a ton of yardage agaisnt the Bears last week). The Vikings don't have a pass defense, though, so look for Romo to go nutzoid - around the second half, as usual.
We'll try to be back Monday for the recap, but it may be as late as Tuesday. In the meantime...is Bucky ever gonna win another game, Humble DevilDog???
Posted by Lord Spatula I, King & Tyrant at October 18, 2007 07:15 AM
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