What do I do? Signs of obsession are pretty easy to spot. For all I know your boyfriend is the studliest, wokest, kindest dude in the multiverse, blessed with the hair of Zayn Malik and the torso of a Hemsworth brother. He stays close and asks where I go and who I am with. I love him to the moon and back and would never imagine anyone else walking down the isle to meet when I get married. You're terrified his future may not involve you because you feel like your future would be nothing without him. I believe, obsession is always harmful whether you are obsessed with good habits or bad habits. ... 10 Signs Your Boyfriend Is Jealous And Dangerously Possessive. If your boyfriend seems obsessed with your butt, you may feel uncomfortable or objectified. Everyone talks about their relationships. I'm lost! If you willingly give up your independence because you want to spend every waking moment with your partner, there's a problem. First of all, my boyfriend (23/m) and myself (22/f) have been in a relationship for almost a year and a half. ... (He doesn’t know how bad my obsession is, but I’m sure he can sense it as much as I pretend to be “cool.”) ... gorgeous and graceful and awe-inspiring. Seriously I'm really afraid. Take a look at your social media timelines as well; how many of your status updates involve your partner? Once you do this a few times and realise a) you didn't die and b) he still loves you, you'll gain confidence to start opening up more and more. Everything is perfectly fine, we have aour arguments from time to time, we have a great relationship (were best friends, we have great sex, we care alot for eachother) But when Im not with him I feel sad. (Highly Accurate). When your significant other takes up your entire life and you no longer have time for anyone else – and worse, when you no longer have a desire to spend time with anyone else – you're exhibiting symptoms of obsession and not cutely wanting to say I love my boyfriend by being with him too much. From recounting everything he has done for you since you met – including the ones you didn’t ask for, to threatening to physically harm you or himself. I am completely obsessed with my boyfriend and I cant control myself. It will feel more awkward than Teresa May's dancing, but persevere. I think about him constantly. Do you define yourself by your relationship? Or even worse, if you are obsessing over a crush or ex-boyfriend / ex-girlfriend that you can't be with, then these obsessive thoughts will prevent you from moving on in life. If he mentions future life plans a knot forms in my stomach about whether or not they involve me. You might actually have sweaty palms, an accelerating heartbeat, and even exhibit the symptoms of a panic attack. Ask Polly: Should I Marry My Boyfriend Even Though He Doesn’t Want Sex? Next time you feel insecure about him, try saying something like "Hey, I'm not sure why but I'm feeling a bit insecure about [insert insecurity-triggering thing here] – I do trust you but I'd really appreciate some reassurance from you." She uses a pseudonym for this column to protect her personal and career opportunities. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year now and I think I may be obsessed with him. Are you constantly texting, Facebooking, or tweeting your significant other? If your boyfriend leaves, you will find another boyfriend to use as your drug. We were seeing each other for no longer than two months and in my vulnerable state I knew I was falling for him, but he just wasn't as interested. Hey guys, I just had an epiphany in the shower. You are using the magnetism that you feel for your boyfriend as a way to fill or numb an emotional void in you. And it makes me want to cling more which is something I normally don't do. I know that sounds cheesy but each time I went out with a guy I'd either end up repulsed by him and desperate to end things or just kind of lukewarm (and desperate to end things). Your obsessive thoughts are an addiction. PETRA SAYS: Carlie, my captivated carnation. Don't betray your partner's trust by snooping through his or her things, and respect him or her enough to respect these boundaries. Do you deeply, painfully believe you are unworthy of genuine love and affection? When you can't do anything by yourself, or refuse to go out by yourself or with friends because your partner isn't coming along, take a long, hard look at yourself, your relationship, and your motivations. This is especially true if you're doing it because you're paranoid or suspicious. Your boyfriend has become your love drug. But now you're with someone who loves you, and it's bringing this issue to the fore. If your friends constantly roll their eyes because every sentence out of your mouth begins with “My boyfriend and I...” or “We had so much fun...” then you may have a problem. Maria Parker June 4, 2020. Have you ever gotten obsessed with your boyfriend or girlfriend? Start addressing these issues now, Carlie, and your psyche will become an exponentially more pleasant place to reside before you know it. I say nope. I’m Obsessed about My Ex-Boyfriend Asked by BR1989 on 2018-05-8 with 1 answer: From Sao Paulo: I have had a relationship with someone (for under 1 year), after 4 months I … 3. This quiz helps you determine if you are just a healthy teen girl/boy or insanely in love with him/her that it could be creepy. He wants to spend all his time with me, calls me and calls me, and never wants to let me out his sight. I'm that crazy girlfriend: the one who is wildly obsessed, fixated even, on your ex. They help you through complicated and difficult love situations like deciphering mixed signals, getting over a breakup, or anything else you’re worried about. I’m a C cup with pink nipples and the boyfriend is obsessed with them. Carlie, I would bet my 2020 Book of Mormon ticket that the answer to all those questions is "yes." Sending messages is okay in moderation, but you have to draw the line somewhere. In the meantime, though, lessen the terror by starting small and simple. About two years ago I met this guy when I was in a pretty s***** place. Is my boyfriend obsessed with me? It's time to face the facts, girl: He's obsessive, so drop him like it's hot. Now, Petra, I have the reverse problem and it's hit me like a truck. Petra Quinn is a 28-year-old professional living and working in Auckland, New Zealand. I'm prone to paranoia about what he's doing when he's not with me. A guy who’s obsessed with you will likely know a lot about you, while you may not know much about him at all. I'm Obsessed With My Ex Boyfriend: Obsessed With Getting My Ex Back. I noticed I have become obsessed and I am so ashamed because I used to pity women like this. Some people including my own love wolf thinks I'm obsessive over him. In fact, it’s more than likely that you only may know him as "that weird guy." If you can't go five minutes without sending a text, a selfie, a poke, or a SnapChat, you're going overboard. I’ve never actually seen her, but I know because I’ve stalked her on Facebook, and Instagram, and Twitter. That's why I'm here on Internet searching for answer. Means, study is good but when you obsessed with this, makes you mental. A lot of people like my chest. Pay attention to what you're going to read to see if he truly loves you or he's just obsessed with you. DEAR ABBY: My sister “Darby” and I are in our 20s and confused about the relationship she is in. I'm overly obsessed with my boyfriend. My friends roll their eyes at how obsessed I am, but I feel I need help. Obsession often comes from insecurity, and there's no need to feel jealous of everyone who even glances at your boyfriend or girlfriend unless you feel extremely insecure. Related Stories. Sponsored: The best dating/relationships advice on the web. Everyone deserves their privacy. Answer me this: do you think there's some indefinable wrongness about you, something repellent and unlovable, that means you just can't have a loving relationship like other people do? Pay attention to what you're going to read to see if he truly loves you or he's just obsessed with you. This is especially true if you get upset when your partner fails to answer within five seconds. I have this urge to tell him how desperate I feel, but that would be love suicide right? But ur in love not obsessed. Right now Im scared of losing, gaining, and maintaining. But here things are little different. Maybe he is blessed with the torso of a Hemsworth brother, but you are the source of your own obsession. I feel like if I lose weight he wont be sexually attracted to me anymore. Its been 3 years. I realised I'm obsessed with my boyfriend. I am obsessed with my boyfriend’s ex-girlfriends. When everything interesting you have to say involves your significant other, you're a little too involved. I think bout my husband who I call Wolfy or love wolf. He doesn't let me talk to men. To the point where, right now, I am fully obsessed with my partner. He calls me normally throughout the day, we usually hang out 4 times a week, etc. I'm in love and so happy. I used to be very independent, made my own rules, did my own thing, I was happy. We've been together for two years and I'm so in love with him. selfesteemwreck: Beauty & Cosmetics: 13: 09-18-2008 06:54 PM: Friend obsessed with new boyfriend: tdot: Relationship Health: 11: 03-24-2005 01:20 PM: Obsessed and HATING it! That's too much, especially if all of this comes with a certainty that your partner is cheating with you or plans to break up with you, just because you're in two different places. Now I do want them bigger. DEAR PETRA: I used to worry that I didn't know how to love. My boyfriend is 14 years older than I am. I feel obsessed with my boyfriend (32M) Am I (21F) codependent? I cannot stop thinking about them. You always suspect your partner of cheating or worry that he will automatically return every come-on or flirtation; that's not I love my boyfriend that's just plain psycho... Where's the trust? I'm obsessed with my body and it's tearing me apart! Good luck! Does that feeling of unworthiness makes you terrified of being vulnerable in front of another person, of letting them see the everyday you who does dull human stuff like clipping her toenails and gets sad and grumpy sometimes and does not perpetually entertain and sparkle? There's a fine line between I love my boyfriend and obsession which isn't healthy for anyone involved; nor does it lead to a strong, long lasting relationship. So, ASAP get rid of that, it will take time but not impossible. Do you snoop? Consult our witty and wise expert Petra Quinn. ... My ex-boyfriend’s new girlfriend is beautiful. I’m sitting in my room and crying and at a loss. Are you obsessed with your crush? I think about him constantly. For example, if you're neglecting your family and friends in favor of spending time with your boyfriend or girlfriend, you've got a big problem! I'm so used to having my boyfriends at the time spend all their time and energy on me and now that I am with this guy it's a huge change. We have a good relationship. I just feel fragile and on edge the whole time - and this is one year in! You can be close to your partner; you can be affectionate, interested, and even occasionally clingy, because we all get in those moods – but “occasionally” is the keyword here, and you can't take it too far. They will also be able to give you the confidence and tools to start communicating honestly with your boyfriend without being terrified that he will leave you. The words "SCARED OF INTIMACY" and "LOW SELF-ESTEEM" are practically leaping out of your letter, Carlie. Becoming obsessed with your significant other can go wrong in dozens of ways from driving them away to just being plain unhealthy for you. I strongly recommend you talk to a therapist or counsellor to unpack this. 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