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“If Mr. Paul wants to be taken seriously, he needs to do more than pull political stunts that fire up impressionable libertarian kids in their college dorms. He needs to know what he’s talking about,” McCain said. “I don’t think what happened yesterday was helpful to the American people.”

—John “Did you know I was a Vietnam POW and a war hero?” McCain

Benedict Arnold was a war hero, too, McRINO.&#160 How’d that work out for him?

You, Juanita McLame, are nothing but a needle-dicked coward.&#160 A douchebag in Republican clothing.&#160 A limp-wristed chickenshit dicklick.&#160 A traitor to the United States of America.

The Ayatollah Obambi is selling this country down the river, you son-of-a-crack-whore-bitch, and you & Lindsay Grahamnesty are helping him paddle the damned thing.

Go ahead and join the Demoscum, McPusstard.&#160 You and&#160 Grahamnesty.&#160 Both of you are worthless as Republicans.

F.E.T.E, as the Imperial Torturer is wont to say.

Satan has begun his eternal raping of Hugito the Needle-Dick&#153.

Let the party…commence!!!

Now who here didn’t see this coming?

I mean, good grief Charlie Brown. It’s as honkin’ big as Cyrano De Bergerac’s nose!!! If you miss that, you’re blind (or looking the other way)!!!

Then again, the modus operandi of the previous four years isn’t about to go away because Al-Obambi got re-elected….so of course Bambi’s going to reboot it now. This sort of presidential pisspottery and pot-calling-the-kettle-black crap, with the obligatory aid of the lap-dog lame stream media as willing accomplices, has clearly made the United States government the laughing stock of the globe. Does the Democratic party really think that We The People&#153 are that brainwashed? Yes, obviously those occupants of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue do. Then again they also believe that if you don’t happen to live at that particular address, then you’re just a peon and incapable of rational human thought.

WRONG there Bambi!!!

You’re the fracking arsehole that pushed for the sequestration months ago. Wait, there’s the answer! Al-Obambi is suffering from early onset Alzheimer’s. We’re in luck, that disease is not covered by his all-encompassing “universal” budget-busting “FREE” healthcare bill. Sorry sir, we’ve deemed you untreatable and you’re being voted off the island. Please leave. No, we don’t have any parting prizes for you. Just go.

What’s this? We can’t criticize the anointed one?

Bullshit we can’t! There still is this thing called the FIRST AMENDMENT you fracking arrogant weasels. Yes, that old, crusty document that you and your fracking arrogant weasel buddies are trying to rip to shreds because it’s full of “negative liberties”.

Get over it! It happens to be the LAW OF THE LAND. And also the thing you pledged to uphold in your OATH OF OFFICE!!!

Yes, in case you missed it I am seriously pissed right now. Al-Obmabi, Jay Carney, Nancy Piglousy, Harry “Dick” Reid, and the rest of the progressives in DC are doing nothing more than the equivalent of throwing a two-year old TANTRUM because they can’t get their way. Obambi claims that the GOP is siding with the rich and wealthy by forcing the sequestration to proceed, but plainly forgets that he’s clearly on the Autobahn with the destination of DESTROYING the America we all know and love! He clearly believes it’s not a matter of “if” but “when” he will arrive at the intended destination. And he’s doing so with a rather Adm. Farragut attitude of “Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead”.

It’s not getting any prettier around here anytime soon denizens. We here at the Southern Command are prepping, are you?

ThatIsAll&#153

(Hat tip (naturally) to Hoft.)

Well, whadda we have here?&#160 Why, it’s yet another chickenshit!!!

Hudson city Alderman, Dave Marston, has found himself in a bit of hot water after an e-mail exchange that saw him refer to Second Amendment supporters as “gun-toting Tea Party psychotards”, implying that all gun supporters are “unemployed”, threatened to “beat you barbarians back”, and tosses in a Nazi reference for good measure.

Apparently Mr. Marston didn’t get his party’s memo concerning the “new tone” in politics.

He apparently didn’t get the memo about trying to display what he clearly does not have:&#160 Balls.

Here’s a pic of the pusstard, just for your edification:

Looks rather Michael Crook-like, doesn’t he?

Davey Pants, anytime you wanna come to Texas and try that, feel free.&#160 Grow a pair & come see us.

And bring your copy of Bambicare, nancy-boy.

On this day in history,

Someone said, did, was doing, or was about to do…….

Something.

Or, nothing at all happened that was historically significant.

Unless you’re a Trivial Pursuit junkie addict.

Or brushing up on your upcoming appearance on Jeopardy.

ThatIsAll&#153

I’m getting awfully damned good at re-doing my Linux box. (sigh)

If you will look here, you will see that the cause of the fire aboard the Carnival Triumph was a fuel leak. Now the question becomes, what caused the leak? Unfortunately  some of our greedy fellow citizens don’t seem to care who is at fault. At least two individuals have filed suit, one apparently within hours of disembarking the ship.

Hoft over at Gateway Pundit is reporting that Missouri Demoscum are proposing legislation to force all Missourians to turn in their guns within 90 days.

4. Any person who, prior to the effective date of this law, was legally in possession of an assault weapon or large capacity magazine shall have ninety days from such effective date to do any of the following without being subject to prosecution:

(1) Remove the assault weapon or large capacity magazine from the state of Missouri;

(2) Render the assault weapon permanently inoperable; or

(3) Surrender the assault weapon or large capacity magazine to the appropriate law enforcement agency for destruction, subject to specific agency regulations.

5. Unlawful manufacture, import, possession, purchase, sale, or transfer of an assault weapon or a large capacity magazine is a class C felony.

We’re one step closer, Denizens.&#160 One.&#160 Step.&#160 Closer.

…if you’re not ready to hear the answer.

Oldie but a goodie.

Lawyers should never ask a Texan grandma a question if they aren’t prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a small town Texas prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, ‘Mrs. Jones, do you know me?’ She responded, ‘Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Howard. I’ve known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you’ve been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you’re a big shot when you haven’t the brains to realize you’ll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.’

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, ‘Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?’

She again replied, ‘Why yes, I do. I’ve known Mr. Lindquist since he was a youngster, too. He’s lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can’t build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.’

The defense attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,

‘If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I’ll send you both to the electric chair.

First there was Chris Rock earlier this week saying Al-Obambi is “Our boss and our daddy”, my reply was “I don’t THINK so. Not to mention there Chrissy Boo Boo, you’ve gone from drinking too much from the koolaid jar, to sucking it whole hog straight from Mrs. Al-Obambi’s teet.

Now, it seems the infection of lunacy in DC is continuing it’s unabated proliferation with Eric Holder coming out and saying that Al-Obambi decides who’s “ENTITLED” (my emphasis added) to Second Amendment rights and who’s not. My thoughts once again?

I don’t THINK so Eric!!!!!

You seem to forget your oath (not to mention Al-Obambi lied while taking the oath, TWICE) to UPHOLD the Constitution, not to shred it like Hitlary did with her industrial-sized paper shredder during the Rose Law Firm days. If you SERIOUSLY think WE THE PEOPLE&#153 are going to tolerate this sort of overt and utterly contemptuous power grab and removal of our FREEDOMS, son you’ve got another thing coming. And don’t be surprised when you get dropkicked clean off the continent. Jus’ sayin’ is all.

Folks, this crap has gone far enough. Let’s not forget there are also Demoscum who are actively working to repeal the 22^nd Amendment in the hopes of getting Al-Obmabi a third term and eventually voted as King and Dictator for life. Do I REALLY have to explain that one and the consequences?????

How much longer can the country survive this sort of lunacy?

Some guy name of Crager posted this on Facebook Friday afternoon.

So one of our fire stations starts having trouble with the dispatch system (receiving other stations’ calls, etc). In the process of troubleshooting, the station’s own dispatch computer crashes. Hard. The backup unit doesn’t work all that well, either (read: it doesn’t work at all).

So I get a known-good dispatch computer to the station, get it successfully re-configured, re-joined to the network, all that silliness – and no sooner do I get it online than the entire dispatch system citywide…goes toes-up.

Anyone wanna start a pool on how soon I go bald from tearing my hair out? %-P

Well, I hear tell this guy’s gone almost completely gray in the span of two months, so…&#160

Given my workload and schedule nowadays, it’s looking more and more like this is going to become a weekend blog.

If that.

It’s never happened in the history of the PFW.&#160 And so help me Cthulhu, it won’t happen again.

TCU 16, Michigan St 17 (Buffalo Wild Wings Bowl)

#11 Oklahoma 13, #9 Texas A&M 41 (Cotton Bowl)

#16 Nebraska 31, #7 Georgia 45 (Capital One Bowl)

Wisconsin 14, #6 Stanford 20 (Rose Bowl)

Dallas 18, at Warshington Foreskins 28

—

I’ll be honest here.&#160 Though it counts as a loss in the PFW, I was actually happy that OU lost to A&M.

Here’s the deal:&#160 It wasn’t so much that the Sooners beat TCU – because, if one is honest with oneself, they didn’t; it was handed to them by fucking blind-assed zebras.&#160 Yet, did Bob Stoops & company acknowledge that fact?

Hell, no.

So when Johnny Heisman surgically dismantled the Sooner defense – it’d be three-and-out, punt, watch Manziel systematically drive down the field & score, rinse, lather repeat – my heart was anything but broken up about it.&#160 And that’s pretty much how the second half went for the Aggies – by the start of the fourth quarter, the only question was the final margin of victory.

So yet again, Oklahoma goes into a bowl game with a team from the SEC – and once again, OU gets its head handed to them.&#160 Schaudenfreude aside, this routine is getting very tiresome.&#160 And if OU has any national championship aspirations going forward…it has to be tiresome for them, as well.

—

Bucky couldn’t beat the Froggies – or keep it anywhere near close against Oregon – with&#160 Bret Bielema.&#160 Did anyone seriously&#160 expect the Badgers to beat Stanford without&#160 him?

(crickets)

Nah, I didn’t think so.

Kevin Hogan proved to be an adequate replacement for Andrew Luck, and Curt Phillips proved he was no Joel Stave, let alone a Russell Wilson or Scott Tolzien.&#160 Bucky did&#160 run for 217 yards but passed for only 83, whereas the Cardinal possessed a more balanced attack (187/157).&#160 And the heretofore unheralded Stanford defense allowed Bucky nothing, save for a pair of 2nd-quarter touchdowns.

Bucky has since hired former Utah State coach Gary Andersen.&#160 Be interesting to see how long he lasts before Barry Alverez pulls yet another head coaching vampire act and takes over again.

—

Once again, when victories were needed, the Cowgirlz – and Tony Romo – pulled their now-famous El Choko acts.

They let an injured ARRRRRRRRR GEEEEEEEEEEE THREEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!&#160 – aka the Quarterback of the Second Coming&#153 – run around, over, and through them, all the while on injured wheels.&#160 And when it wasn’t him, it was NCAA Division XI running back (Florida Atlantic?&#160 Really???) Alfrieda (no, no typo) Morris running through them, as well.

And even though he got second-, third- and fourth-stringers to play above their heads, the defense’s overall play rightly cost Rob Ryan his job (Dallas has since hired 4-3 “Tampa Two” guru Monte Kiffin, fired/released assistant coaches Skip Peete & John Garrett and turned play-calling duties over to Bill Callahan).&#160 In seven years running the 3-4, Dallas made the playoffs four times and won one – yes, one – playoff game.

But then, this is what happens when your owner fancies himself a football man & superior GM.

—

Speaking of Bill Callahan, I’m done with him.

Bo Pelini, that is.&#160 Man may as well be Bill Callahan to me.

After giving up 70 to an offensively-challanged Bucky, the so-called “Blackshirts” gave up damned near 50 to the ‘Dawgs.&#160 This, when Pelini is supposedly:&#160 1) a defensive guru, and 2) a big-game motivator of a coach.

I often speak of coaches being in over their heads – usually when speaking about Gary Patterson.&#160 But it’s clear Pelini is of the ever-growing fraternity of coaches who make great coordinators, but who Peter Principle themselves when stepping into the top spot.&#160 (See, “Campo, Dave”, “Turner, Norv”, “Wannstedt, Dave” and “Phillips, Wade” for reference.)&#160 Pelini just can’t get the job done at this level, and it’s time for him to go.

And until Nebraska’s athletic director wises up & sees to it, the Huskers are once again out of the PFW.

—

Speaking of Gary Patterson…this one’s on him.

Tell me who in their right-fuckin’-mind leaves Skye “Clank” Dawson back for a punt deep in his own territory?

This guy has one asset:&#160 Speed.&#160 That’s it.&#160 Nothing else.&#160 He does not catch the ball well.&#160 He does not hold onto the ball well when he does&#160 have it.&#160 He is the absolute last person you want handling a punt.&#160 Hell, I’d let a lineman&#160 field a punt before Skye Dawson.

Yet there he was, he & Patterson daring fate.&#160 And Fate&#153 rose up and bit both Patterson & Dawson flush in the ass.

Boom – fumble.&#160 Boom – Spartans recover.&#160 Boom – the subsequent score provided the winning points.

Gary?&#160 Remember the concept of “attaboy/awshit”?&#160 That stupid-assed decision to put “Clank” back there rates as one of your poorer ones – and is absolutely “awshit”-worthy.

Next year, you get Pachall back.&#160 (Now, I had previously predicted he’d never play another down for the Frogs, and I still don’t necessarily think he should, but…)&#160 Any more dumbshit decisions like this, and it’ll be 7-6 all over again.

And then, maybe it’s time for your coaching acumen to be questioned.

—

So, there you go.&#160 Oh-and-five.&#160 Going completely winless in a PFW.&#160 In seven years of doing this, an oh-fer when all (well, most) of my teams were in has never happened.

Until now.

And in watching this travesty, I’m seeing programs that think they’re automatically entitled to win – just throw the ball out there and let the wins roll in.&#160 These programs think their shit don’t stink.

And that attitude…is highly offensive.&#160 And it showed in the bowl results, and in the end of the season for the Cowgirlz.

There will be changes in the Perfect Football Weekend&#153 come next season.&#160 What we saw this year, we will not see next year.&#160 (And don’t get me wrong – once again, I fully realize that this has all the effect of a gnat’s fart in the Real World&#153.&#160 I’m well aware that the world does not revolve around either me or This Fine Blog&#153.&#160 This is just how pissed off I am about the crappy play I had to watch this year, mkay?)

However, with all that said – I’m once again invoking Executive Fiat&#153 because of this.

Seattle 24, Warshington Foreskins 14

The Second Coming&#153 wasn’t even the best rookie quarterback on the field.&#160 How fucking sweet was that?

This week:&#160 0-6.&#160 Perfect Football Weekend achieved, anyway (Executive Fiat&#153 (9)).&#160 Final 2012 record:&#160 58-37.

We’ll reconvene in August, after the Tex-ass StrangerS&#153 have long since made themselves irrelevant in, say, June.&#160 And we’ll be back with different teams – and, hopefully, different attitudes.

See you then.

My respect for Jim Nabors just went to negative-infinity.

The actor best known for playing the TV character Gomer Pyle in the 1960s has married his male partner of 38 years.

Hawaii News Now (http://bit.ly/14tFM3U) reports Jim Nabors and his partner, Stan Cadwallader, traveled from their Honolulu home to Seattle to be married Jan. 15.

And before you ask – no, I didn’t&#160 know.

So the traditional icons are falling, one by one.&#160 First the Boy Scouts, now Gomer Pyle.

God’s judgment on this nation can’t come soon enough.

The Boy Scouts, apparently, are considering suicide.

The Boy Scouts of America is considering an end to its longstanding policy of banning gay Scouts and Scout leaders, the organization said on Monday.

The new policy would eliminate the ban on gays from the organization’s national rules, allowing local chapters to decide for themselves.

“The BSA is discussing potentially removing the national membership restriction regarding sexual orientation,” Deron Smith, a spokesman for the Boy Scouts of America, wrote in an email to Yahoo News. “This would mean there would no longer be any national policy regarding sexual orientation, but that the chartered organizations that oversee and deliver Scouting would accept membership and select leaders consistent with their organization’s mission, principles or religious beliefs.”

How about the Church Of The Shrinking Organization&#153?

Alas, poor BSA.&#160 We hardly knew ye.